Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Today can go fuck itself and the RTA bus system can burn in hell.

This will be on both my blog and Facebook account.

          Well, my day started off badly. I went to bed sometime between 8-9 PM and ended up waking up around 3:20 and not being able to fall back asleep. Since I woke up so early, I ended up getting hungry again before getting on the bus but didn't have time to eat. By the time I got on, I was really damn hungry but they have a no eating or drinking rule (I.E. I can't even sip fucking water). Well, the first bus I was on had low seats so I couldn't sneak myself something to eat. When I got on the second bus, I sat at the way back and began to eat my sandwich shortly after the bus began running. That turned out to be a terrible move. A bus driver driving a different bus who is a total jackass noticed me eating a sandwich and gave me a stare so nasty that he acted like I had just flipped him off or something. He then immediately informed the other bus driver and on the next stop, the guy driving the bus I was on walked up to me and chewed me out. While he had the right to be annoyed (they could lose their job by not enforcing that stupid rule), I'm extremely pissed off at the guy who was driving the other bus. I can't believe anyone would give someone such a nasty stare for eating a fucking sandwich. I was starving and thought I wouldn't have time to eat it before my counseling appointment (I got the time mixed up by ten minutes again ._.). There was one time in my first semester of college where a person had to dump their drink because of the rule and the bus driver was apologetic because he had to enforce it. Bus drivers like that have my respect because they aren't asses about it.

          Unfortunately, my counseling appointment was my last one since I'm won't be going back to Cal Poly next term. I also attended an appointment at career services which was my first...and last appointment there. I ended up talking to both of them about how I'm looking into Computer Science as a major but that because of the math requirements, I'm likely to be stuck there for a really long time. Even though I originally started Algebra 1 in 8th grade, the high school I went to didn't offer Geometry or Algebra 2 so I ended up having to take that subject one semester (worst math teacher I ever had) and now I have to take Geometry next semester before I can move onto anything else. With all the math classes I would need to take for my major, I might end up having to spend AN ADDITIONAL TWO AND A HALF FUCKING YEARS AT HANCOCK BECAUSE THE MATH CLASSES HAVE TO BE DONE AT A SPECIFIC FUCKING ORDER AND THE FUCKING SEMESTER SYSTEM MAKES IT TAKE A RIDICULOUS AMOUNT OF TIME! I am so devastated over this that I'm honestly wondering if I should consider dropping out because I don't think I have enough sanity to stand being stuck at community college that long. When it comes to alternative majors, I am absolutely clueless. I would really like to be in the gaming industry and it doesn't seem like there's a lot of specific majors that could help me get a job in it. I worked so hard to graduate last Spring and to get into Cal Poly only for this to happen. I don't know what else to do, but I certainly know this situation is eating me up inside.

          I was really hoping that Cal Poly would've been successful for me and that I would be done in 2013. Instead, I won't even be done with my community college education by then. I was hoping to begin living in a dorm next term which would have been really damn nice since I really hate living at home. I'm sick and tired of dealing with my mom's bullshit regarding her lack of stability with her sobriety and I just don't think it's healthy for me to still be living at home for both my sake and my parents. At the same time, if I was able to get some job that was decent enough for me to live off of, I would probably be very busy with work, my education would probably suffer terribly any semester that wasn't a light load, and most likely live at a shitty apartment in a shitty town like Santa Maria. There's no way in fucking hell I would want to have to commute with RTA's buses frequently if I was living on my own. Quite honestly, after the events from today, I hate the fact I have to ever ride those buses again and wished I could avoid it entirely.

          While my situation on the way to school was bad, the way back turned out to be significantly worse. I caught SLO Transit's route 6B bus at 4:02 (WHICH IS ALWAYS ON TIME BTW BECAUSE SLO TRANSIT HAS THEIR SHIT TOGETHER!) and got off at about 4:17 I think, possibly earlier. I caught the 10SB bus a few minutes before it was supposed to leave at 4:33. It ended up not leaving until around 16 minutes after that because route 9 was late and had a transfer from a person in a wheelchair. The bus was supposed to arrive in the outlets at 5 but yet it didn't even leave SLO until 5:08. By the time it arrived, it was record-breakingly late. (I know it's not a word. STFU. >_>) Now I usually catch a car ride home but since my dad is on his boat and my mom has been irresponsible when it comes to keeping up to date with her driver's license and car sticker, she couldn't pick me up that day. By the time the bus arrived to ampm, it was about 5:32 making it over 25 minutes late. Since one bus stop was discontinued, I could have had it drop me off at a location that would have caused me to do less walking toward my home. However, she claimed the route 21 bus would arrive in about 10 minutes but I told her I thought it was supposed to arrive around 5:21. However, she was extremely confident that she was right and since it was her job, I took her word for it even though I had a bad feeling about it. The route 24 came by like 7 minutes later and the route 23 came about 17 minutes later so clearly SHE WAS FUCKING WRONG!

          While waiting, I was utterly pissed off and so, so cold. I ended up ranting to some guy about how much I hate RTA while I waited for some bus to pick me up. Ended up catching the route 23 bus since I had waited out there for 17 minutes and was sick of freezing my ass off. Had I ignored the dumb lady's advice and walked home, I probably would have been home like half an hour earlier than when I finally arrived home at 6:20. So, get this. I first caught a bus at 4:02 and wasn't able to get home until 6:20. The time it takes to drive to Cal Poly from my house is like 25 fucking minutes. So to make matters worse, I began to become really hungry around 4:40 and couldn't eat my sandwich because of their retarded rule. Why do they have such a strict no eating rule? Probably because their buses are super filthy and they don't want to clean them so a lot of people like me has to suffer. The people in charge of RTA are total dipshits and the whole bus system is so poorly run. I have hated RTA for years and have been appalled at all the times when buses broke down or other instances where a bus was unbelievably late, but today was definitely my worst experience with them. I never want to ride with them again but I have no choice if I want to continue my education since Cal Poly didn't work out at all.

          While it's possible I over-exaggerated about the look that one bus driver made (he looked pretty pissed off) and that I'm likely being too much of a whiny bitch about my bad bus experience today, the shittiness of my circumstances with my education cannot be understated. I don't know what to do about my situation and it enrages me how much I fucked up. I honestly didn't even realize how important my major was to my education until I arrived there and I feel pretty goddamn stupid about that. I wanted to be done with community college so badly within three years that I somehow got into this mess. Didn't help that I once had to drop an entire semester due to medical issues. That caused me to feel more rushed and I didn't realize changing my major at Cal Poly could be impossible. This is one of the most consequential fuckups I've ever done and I'm certainly paying the price. Let's see, if I ended up not being done with Hancock until 2014, I would be 25 and possibly finish my university education at 27. Fuck my life.

Fun Fact: If you include this sentence, I said fuck 13 times in this entry and it was a lot more until I did some clean up on the vulgarity. :o

Monday, September 19, 2011

I am a dumb sack of horse shit.

That is all.

Well, not really, but I don't have the time a write out a journal entry since one of my teachers on the first day of school was nice enough to assign a 3-5 page journal entry that has to be professionally written about some reading that's due before even the next class session. It has to be turned in tomorrow by midnight but yet the next class isn't even until the day after tomorrow. Oh well...

Edit-

After looking over the syllabus, it turns out that I misheard the teacher in class and he actually isn't quite that insane. See folks, dumb sack of horse shit. @_@ Oh well. I better do the reading anyways and then go to bed instead of work on this journal entry.

-William         

Monday, August 29, 2011

MSN Health, go fuck yourself!

7 Bedtime Habits Ruining Your Sleep

This article is full of shit.

1. Who says bedtime is just for kids? Take extra care to maintain your sleep schedule, especially on the weekends. The body responds to routine. If your bedtime is sporadic—11 p.m. some nights, 1 a.m. others—your mind won't be properly prepared to snooze on the weekdays.

Who says bedtimes are just for kids? I fucking do. Back in high school, my parents used to make me go to bed sometime between 12-1 AM and you know what happened? I usually ended up laying in my bed for 3-4 hours completely fucking awake. As soon as I no longer had follow a bedtime and went to bed when I'm tired instead, I started getting more sleep than I did before. Not a good amount of sleep, but it was definitely an improvement.

2. Reading before bed is a habit for many. Problem is, your body has likely adapted to that routine—it won't go to sleep until you've logged a couple chapters. Retreat to a comfy couch or window nook instead for your literary fix. The bed should be off limits for anything other than sleep or sex.

My uncle just now woke up because of insomnia problems. What did he do to combat it? Read a little, then turn out the lights. About ten minutes later, I heard him snoring really loudly.

3. The brightness of your computer screen stimulates the brain. Plus, it's difficult for your mind to stop fretting about your digital to-do list, even after you've logged off. Avoid late-night surfing and shut down your computer. Give yourself time to wind down without any electronics.

Give my time to wind down without any electronics? Could you give suggestions on what the hell I could possibly do? One of my biggest issues in trying to fall asleep is shutting off my mind. If I am bored, my mind will not shut up.

4. A good mattress will cost you anywhere from $500 to more than $3,000. Consider it money well spent. A decent mattress—do your homework!—will give you a more restful sleep. The same is true for quality bedding and pillows. Opt for a soft pillow if you're a back or stomach sleeper. Buy a firmer pillow if you sleep on your side.

Only good advice in the whole article.


5. The looming glare of your alarm clock can be distracting when trying to sleep. The goal is to have as dark a room as possible. Block the bright numbers with a book or consider buying a small travel clock. Your cell phone alarm may also do the trick.

I like knowing what time it is at night when I'm trying to sleep. Sometimes I could be lying down for quite a while and might need to modify when I wake up or I simply just want to know how much of my time has been wasted and if it's worth continuing trying to sleep. For example, I got out of bed less than an hour ago because I couldn't fucking sleep and knowing how much time had passed made it more obvious to me I needed to get up.

6. When you just can't fall asleep, it's useless to stay in bed. If you've been trying to fall asleep for more than 30 minutes, the National Sleep Foundation suggests doing something mundane, like balancing a checkbook, reading or watching TV. An activity that demands marginal brainpower will lull your mind. Before you know it, you'll be crawling back into bed genuinely tired.

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO COUNT MY SLEEP WITHOUT BEING ABLE TO LOOK AT AN ALARM CLOCK? My vision sucks and I cannot wear contacts while I sleep so it's important I'm able to see what fucking time it is. Also, it's very rare it takes me less than half an hour to go to sleep. Even on nights where I'm extremely tired and exhausted, it still usually takes me at least thirty minutes unless I'm insanely sleep deprived which I would be at a far more regular basis if I followed this shithole advice.

7. Daytime workouts will keep you invigorated for hours. That's why you don't want to exercise within three hours of hitting the sack. Intense physical activity raises your body temperature and pumps your energy level—both interrupt a calm transition into sleep.

 Probably not the best to try going to bed shortly after working out. At the same time, hard work can be very tiring and actually improve sleep. Not sure if this advice is good or bad since I can't think of anytime I'm gone to bed shortly after working out.

Well, there you go folks. Yet another horrible article by MSN. Who the fuck hires these writers?

Edit-

What Does Your Space Say About You?

While this article is nowhere near as a bad as the last one, I hate how it portrays introverts in a very extreme light. Not all introverts are anti-social, people hating assholes. While that wasn't the exact message, they certainly implied introverts in the most negative light they could get away with. :|

-William         

Thursday, August 25, 2011

I don't think this blog will ever go anywhere, but who knows.

          Much of the time I think about typing up an entry about something really interesting, I feel it's too personal to put on here. Considering how I have a history of admitting stuff I shouldn't on forums, it's somewhat surprising. Perhaps the fact I have actual rl friends now is a major factor. Back in 2009 for example, if I posted something embarrassing online, there's no way in hell someone I know irl could find it. That's different now, but I just feel a lot of certain types of journals I would consider making to be too personal to just post on the web for everyone to see.

          Admittedly, I've been more depressed in recent months and have been going through a lot of mental bullshit. I've been trying to figure out more aspects of myself and how to make myself happier as a person. Some of what goes on in my head is a bit pathetic and those aspects are probably the main reason I use my blog less. If I write an entry regarding stuff that goes through my head, I don't want to censor it just to make myself not sound as bad. At the same time, I don't want to sound extremely pathetic. As a solution, I just rarely write blog entries. Maybe I should start making private journal entries and only show specific entries to very few people. Somewhat did that to one entry I never finished.

-William         

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Alcohol Part 3

6/22/2012 Update: Link removed. If you want the link, please message me.

I originally thought to make a blog entry but ended up posting a chatlog instead. For the few of you who haven't read how my first night attempting alcohol went, there's the link. Unfortunately, it's been 19 days since I last tried alcohol because I don't have a drinking buddy. :/ My social life is a real joke. >_<

-William         

Friday, May 20, 2011

Alcohol Part 2

          Remember my first entry about alcohol? I changed my mind. I want to try alcohol now. >_> As for the lack of blog updates, there's like three unfinished blog entries I made that are in draft form that may never be released.

-William         

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

I'm really tired of my mom's irresponsibility.

          She needs to grow the fuck and start acting responsible again. When she isn't drinking, she'll fucking lie or do whatever she can to get pills. She was overdosing so badly on Lyrica that she was having medical problems that caused me to fear that she might have cancer so I let her borrow a bunch of money (like around $160) just so she could take some tests. Actually, let me take that back. She stole some of my money to take some tests without even asking to borrow first. She has stolen a lot of my money in the past for booze and drugs. My dad had to buy a $100 safe because she broke some $20 one he once bought. Kind mother I have, huh? Oh how I miss the days prior to her doing things like this. Alcohol and drugs are destroying her and there's barely anything I can do about it.

-William         

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Candlemass in the Gym = Epic Reaction

Note: This was originally put on my Facebook yesterday but since not everyone who looks at my blog uses Facebook, I'm putting it here as well.

Before I write about what happened, I want to give some backstory. The station played most of the time when I'm working out in the gym is the god awful The Beat. It plays the same exact shit everyday in such an extreme form that it replays many of the same songs every 60-90 minutes. To make matters worse, The Beat plays nothing but terrible pop and hip-hop songs. It's such a horrible radio station that it's practically unreal it exists.The person in charge of watching over the gym from 2:30 to 3:30 is Sal who hates a lot of the stuff that gets played but he likes giving students the freedom to play they want regardless of how much he hates the music. He pretty much encouraged me to bring whatever the hell I want so today, I did just that. The reactions to my Candlemass CD was priceless. Two minutes into Epicus Doomicus Metallicus, the music went completely silent because somebody turned it off. Since Sal is awesome, he thought that was an absolute bullshit moveo n some person's part and the album got started over. ^_^

When I went to put the CD back into the player (which someone took out shoddily), some person asked me "What is this?" and my response was "It's Candlemass's awesome debut album." During the first song, some really strong guy went up to me to say, "Does this music make you all depressed? It's all about death and misery." My response was that I think the lyrics are hilarious because every song is so over the top and that I absolutely loved the album. Then he asked if the CD could be taken out in 20 minutes. <_< I pointed out how nearly all of the music that gets played in the gym is music that I can barely tolerate but yet I hear the same songs everytime I go to the gym because it's always playing The Beat. Then he was all, "30 minutes?"  My answer was that my favorite song on the album is the closer and that the album was around 42 minutes long. This caused him to be all, "w/e okay" and later on, he stated that he thought the riffs had a very depressing tone.

During the third song which was Crystal Ball, someone apparently couldn't stand it anymore and switched it to the radio. >_> No idea who did it other than that it was someone from the football team. I was originally going to never bring the CD back, but since the second side was never even started, I'm bring it back on Monday and starting it on side 2. Once again, Sal pretty much encouraged me to do that. <_< He said he kinda liked the music and I know he likes "head banging music" so he's probably relieved at the idea of not having to hear nothing but complete shit on his Monday visit to the gym. I think it's hilarious how a lot of these really strong, totally pumped guys are really bothered by doom metal but enjoy listening to complete fucking shit. Most of these songs practically all sound the same, have no originality, and some of these football players sing the lyrics to these terrible tracks. "OH DONNA! OH DONNA! OH DONNA! OH DONNA!" "BUT YOU WON'T DO THE SAME!" "I WANT TO SEE YOU TONIGHT!" I hate The Beat so much and I'm looking forward to the reactions on Monday to Candlemass's second half.

-William          

Monday, March 7, 2011

Alcohol

          I really don't understand the appeal of alcohol. Some person told me the other day that it's because I've never given it a try. While the lack of experience of trying it definitely affects my view of alcohol, there's three major reasons why I flat out don't want to drink with the most major reason probably being bad experiences with my mom's alcoholism. Thankfully, while she has been sober for I think around four months, my dealings with her alcoholism in '09 and '10 was a heartbreaking, depressing nightmare. I was looking at some of my chatlogs the one day and was amazed that I once told snake that she made me want to punch her in the face. I know I've said this a million times but when she's sober, she's a wonderful, dedicated, loving person who's a joy to be around. But when she's drinking, she's a horrible, selfish, mean bitch. Anyways, enough of that. Most of you have heard enough rantings about what alcohol does to my mother.

          Another major reason I lack interest in booze is the idea of lacking control of my actions. I went to a bar recently as part of Charlotte's birthday and sadly, the bar was nothing like what I used to see on Cheers. >_> The people at that place were some of the loudest people I've ever been near. I absolutely hate the way a lot of people act like when they're drunk and generally hate the idea of being around people in that state. 5/20/2011 Update: I decided to take out most of this paragraph out due to various reasons.

          As for the third reason, the concept of not being able to remember events that occurred the night before scares the fucking shit out of me. I have a great memory of my life to where I can think of a lot of moments from when I was five years old. My memory of my childhood in general is excellent and it amazes me how so many people lack memories of their early grade school years. In all honesty, since I'm a very curious person, the idea of getting drunk once in my life doesn't sound like a horrible idea...except the fact there's a risk of not being able to remember much of what happened which ruins the purpose of trying something once. If I got shitfaced drunk to where couldn't remember my night at all, my main memories of getting drunk would be a hangover. Fucking lame. :/ That's not to say I'm stupid enough to think getting drunk automatically = won't remember a fucking thing, but the idea of lacking a memory of a recent event really bothers me.

          Those who are reading this are most likely surprised to see a new blog entry from me. My blog was originally going to be updated regularly but creating a Facebook killed my original plans for it. Despite my neglect toward this blog, I'm glad I made both a Facebook and a blog. I originally intended Twitter to be my place to bitch about things that could fit in a 140 character limit and my blog to be where I talk about stuff that could never fit in that ridiculously small limit. So, whether you guys like it or not, I'm going to start using my blog more often but with a different approach. It'll have a much smaller emphasis on funny, angry rants and be mostly about serious stuff along with things that have been on my mind a lot lately. The name WACHROO is a keeper though.

-William         

Thursday, January 6, 2011

My top ten most listened to artists in 2010 for overall song plays.

1. King Crimson (981 plays)
2. Black Sabbath (848 plays)
3. Neil Young (742 plays)
4. Queen (531 plays)
5. Yes (496 plays)
6. Gorillaz (452 plays)
7. Reverend Bizarre (442 plays)
8. Jethro Tull (399 plays)
9. Arthur Brown (307 plays)
10. The Velvet Underground (300 plays)

Unfortunately, most of these bands have either disbanded, they're lacking people who were key members in past lineups, they barely tour at all, or they're way, way past their prime and now play a lot of music at shows that I flat out don't care for.

1. King Crimson won't tour for a while but they have had many drastic lineup changes over the years with my two favorite lineups having no chance of ever getting back together. They rarely ever play their pre-'80s stuff except for 4 songs. :(
2. Dio died last year, Tony Martin is almost guaranteed to never rejoin Black Sabbath, and Ozzy made it very clear that he has no interest in touring.
3. Neil Young tours regularly but his concerts cost a fortunate. I think my aunt said she paid $200 to see him live earlier this year.
4. Queen plans to announce some live plans but without Freddie Mercury, it isn't the same.
5. Yes no longer has their original vocalist who has played on almost all of their albums plus their original drummer Bill Ward who's my favorite drummer ever is no longer in the band. He was also in King Crimson for a long time. ^_^
6. Gorillaz is no where near as good live as they are in the studio and I don't care for a lot of their songs.
7. Reverend Bizzare is dead and released their final album as "So Long Suckers" for a reason. >_>
8. Jethro Tull is the only band on this list to have not lost one of their two most important members from any era of their band and they tour often. However, none of their concerts are anywhere close to here. <_<
9. Arthur Brown still does some live stuff but he's no longer with his best lineups plus I don't think he tours in America anymore.
10. The Velvet Underground died in the early '70s and is never coming back unless a miracle happens.

Well, that was depressing. >_>

-William